It doesn’t matter how dear a person is to us and how much we love them; after all, each of us is a separate universe with our views on things. Sometimes a quarrel is a bell that notifies us that it’s time to take a step back and figure out what is going wrong. But, of course, after all the accumulated emotions have finally been thrown out, we do not feel very happy and comfortable. So while some are thinking about whether it’s possible to live happy family life without quarrels, others understand that it is impossible to imagine human relations without them. But there’s a way out – you need to know how to improve relationships after a quarrel and learn the right lessons.
Some conflicts arise out of the blue, and some need a few “prompts” to finally turn into an unpleasant conversation in a raised voice. Therefore, if you feel that the situation usually escalates when some triggers are present, it’s best to do your best to prevent the fight. Try to take a few breaths in and out before you say something. Remember that a fight requires two people. A life hack – do some physical activity – let your fervor fade away, and your brain gets distracted. If your loved one persists and continues to create conflict, try to disarm them and say something neutral. For example, “You may be right. I looked at it a little differently,” or “We both need to calm down a little. And then we’ll surely talk about it.”
Sometimes, after thunder and lightning have struck between you and your family members, there can be a lull. More precisely, you decide to play silent. Unfortunately, the conflict will not go away by itself, and the longer you avoid reconciliation and heart-to-heart talk, the less likely it will be resolved correctly. A solution will still need to be found, and it’s better to do this sooner than later, without attracting unnecessary irritability into an already strained relationship. Most likely, you have something to apologize for, so if you are the first to go to reconciliation, you will look like the person who analyzed their mistakes and is ready to make efforts to become better.
Close people are therefore called close because you know the greatest secrets, fears, and insecurities of each other. And at the moment of a quarrel, we often succumb to the temptation to recall some unpleasant action of a person or compare with someone, to humiliate. Hence follow the rule: do not show your mental weakness and do not hit on a sore spot. This way, first of all, you will not achieve anything good, but rather the opposite negative effect and a deterioration in your attitude. And secondly, a sense of trust can disappear between you, which is very difficult to get and almost impossible to revive.
Learn to show empathy for your loved ones because in this way, you will notice more similarities between you than differences, and you will be able to avoid disagreements. Respect the point of view of others and do not try to impose your vision on others. It doesn’t matter if we are talking about a family member younger than you (your child), a peer (husband, sister), or an older generation (parents, grandparents) – as already mentioned, we are all unique. Therefore our perception of the situation may differ. Above all, let them know that you respect their view of things and always listen to them carefully.
Most importantly, remember to focus on the positive side to maintain a healthy balance in your relationship at all times. For example, get in the habit of showing your gratitude, even for unexpected but pleasant little things. Thus, the person will want to please you more, see your smile, and smile in return. Each person is pleased when their work and efforts are noticed and appreciated. Our loved ones deserve words of praise as well as understanding and the first steps towards reconciliation more than anyone else. I wish you good relations and fewer conflicts in your family!
